I like to look good. I like to have nice things --clothes, watches, cologne, art --but I feel a lot of guilt for having said nice things, when they aren't things I need to live.
I feel the need to be closer to home, and to have a dog, but at the same time to go overseas again.
I don't yet know how I can balance these two things.
I want to be this guy, helping the kid. He's a part of Tiny Hands International, check it out.
But I don't know if my heart can take any more. I start tearing up anytime I think about my kids in Majuro. I can't read the letters they wrote to me before I left without crying. Part of my heart is still there, and I don't know how I could do it again.
I have money sitting in a bank account, and I can't bring myself to spend it on things I like, because they aren't necessity, and yet I want to have money for the future so I can be a provider, and still it bothers me to no end that it just sits there, not being used, when I could be donating it to help stop trafficking of women and children, and feeding people that don't have anything. I need to create balance. I know I can have both. I can have peace.